Today's post is not spiritual in the most sense.  It's a moment of weakness for me.  A moment to allow my flesh to rise up and over take, if only for this short moment-I hope!  I feel like I am so stretched and pulled.  I feel so overwhelmed.  I feel so clueless.  My health is beginning to start to see the effects of this.  Every intervention I do on myself seems to stretch me a little farther.  Why can't I be disciplined?  Why do I give in to weakness?

As I have said before the woman spoken of in Proverbs 31 had help...see Proverbs 31:15...she had maidens.  The things I want out of life are going to require me to work for it.  Both physical worldly work and spiritual work.

How can I balance God, Husband, Home, Work, School, and the desires of my flesh without becoming overwhelmed every once in a while?

How can a woman who gives and gives and gives feel like she is so forgotten?  Why do I feel so overwhelmed all of the time?  I don't want to be perfect.  Giving 110% of me, means that a few things in life is going to lack.

This is how it feels...I want to combine some of these...but right now I can't.

I am tired.  I am weak.  I am woman.  Definitely not the Proverbs 31 woman!

Learning Along the Way

God has been showing me some things for the past little while.  I try so hard to apply these things onto the tables of my heart first, because I long to be a teacher/leader with example.  It gets hard to do so.  When we call ourselves "Christian" we need to not take it lightly.  We are, in fact, not necessarily labeling ourselves, but taking on Christ's "last name".  When we get saved we become the bride of Christ; therefore, we are no longer known as who we were before, but as a Christian.  It's not a label or a classification-it is HIS name we adorn on ourselves.

When we become married to Christ we start a new journey of learning.  Learning by reading and studying, by trial and error, and by example.  In this order.  We need to read and study of how we are to do things before we can do them and before we know if the example we look at is real.

This is where I am at in life.  I have grown and learned new things, but before I can teach and lead I need to get my example corrected first.  We never will be perfect we can only strive to do the best we can.  The people who look upon our lives need to know that and trust that when we do fail that we will take heed to the Holy Spirit's urge of correction, and promptly do just that-correct our lives.

How is your example looking?  Who is looking at your example?  Does my example match my words at home, work, and church?  These are questions we need to ponder and see where the Holy Spirit leads us.

"Help me Lord to be transformed by the renewing of my mind.  Help me to be molded into what you want me to be.  Help me to set the example you would have me set and help me Lord to not be double minded in my ways.  I love you Lord.  In Jesus' name I pray~Amen."